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I just found out today that the
reason I wasn't sent a hospital bill
for my 4 cracked ribs and sternum
is because a
- Mood:
shocked - Music:"Letdown" by This Providence
Alright. I don't know how long it takes
a letter to get from Michigan to
Colorado.
But it's been a week. Today.
And I'm a nervous fucking wreck.
I'm going to stretch my patience
and give them a week and a half.
Because if it gets there today,
they can respond if they choose to.
And send me back a letter.
Which would take another week.
So a week and a half sounds
fucking reasonable to me.
Hell, I've waited this long...right?
Ironically...
today is also their
wedding anniversary.
I wonder if they'll celebrate or not
considering The Bitch can't make
up her mind about wanting a divorce
or not.
On a different note,
today is also the 5 year mark of my
Acid Reflux surgery for my
GERD.
And in one more year,
I have to go
for my follow up.
Wish me luck.
I'd hate to have to go through
that fucking surgery again...
- Mood:
bitchy - Music:"Ready" by Kelly Clarkson
Happy 22nd Birthday to me
I love Fall.
- Mood: awake
- Music:"Whatever You Like" by T.I.
I actually feel pretty here. :)
Yay.
- Music:"Taper Jean Girl" by Kings of Leon
Me and my girls!
Ashley, Me, and Skye.
Their first High School Dance.
I did their Make-up and Hair. Yay!
Aww <33
Me and Ashley.
She's so pretty!!!!
I fucking love the rain. If I weren't so sick, I'd go walking in it.
Fuck you strep throat.
I feel like I'm on house arrest.
I want to go to Chicago and walk in the rain downtown.
<333
- Mood:
sick
Passing that kidney stone was one of the worst physical pains I've ever experienced. I do NOT look forward to passing the next ones.
- Mood:in PAIN
- Mood: irritated
- Music:"Beg" by Evans Blue
- Mood:
calm - Music:"Rise Above This" by Seether
It was an engagement ring....
- Mood: shocked
First thing I'm buying with my pay checks......
A flight to Colorado.
You might be reading this, but then again you might not.
I couldnt email you back on Myspace because of your privacy settings.
So this is my response....
You shouldn't even be concerned about it just because you're with her now and I'm part of your past.
I'm glad she makes you happy and I'm not saying that sarcastically. I couldn't do it, so if she does it, then so be it. I mean it when I say you deserve to be happy. You're a great person and you deserve only the best.
- Mood:
disappointed
Put in two applications today at the hospital.
1. For the Radiology Clerk in the Rad/Tech wing
and
2. For a receptionist at the Women's Center
both of which said they had openings for.
keep your fingers crossed. :)
- Mood:
excited - Music:"So Hott" by Kid Rock
"Gravity" by Sara Bareilles
Something always brings me back to you.
It never takes too long.
No matter what I say or do I'll still feel you here 'til the moment I'm gone.
You hold me without touch.
You keep me without chains.
I never wanted anything so much than to drown in your love and not feel your reign.
[CHORUS:]
Set me free, leave me be. I don't want to fall another moment into your gravity.
Here I am and I stand so tall, just the way I'm supposed to be.
But you're on to me and all over me.
You loved me 'cause I'm fragile.
When I thought that I was strong.
But you touch me for a little while and all my fragile strength is gone.
[CHORUS]
I live here on my knees as I try to make you see that you're everything I think I need here on
The ground.
But you're neither friend nor foe though I can't seem to let you go.
The one thing that I still know is that you're keeping me down
- Mood: cranky
I know we're not together
and I probably shouldn't think this
or keep having these thoughts...
...but your default picture-
is so fucking hot....
damn!
"Maybe"
By: Kelly Clarkson
I'm strong
But I break
I'm stubborn
And I make plenty of mistakes
Yeah I'm hard
And life with me is never easy
To figure out, to love
I'm jaded but oh so lovely
All you have to do is hold me
And you'll know and you'll see just how sweet it can be
If you'll trust me, love me, let me
Maybe, maybe
Someday
When we're at the same place
When we're on the same road
When it's OK to hold my hand
Without feeling lost
Without all the excuses
When it's just because you love me, you let me, you need me
Then maybe, maybe
All you have to do is hold me
And you'll know and you'll see just how sweet it can be
If you'll trust me, love me, let me
Maybe, maybe
I'm confusing as hell
I'm north and south
And I'll probably never have it all figured out
But what I know is I wasn't meant to walk this world without you
And I promise I'll try
Yeah I'm gonna try to give you every little part of me
Every single detail you missed with your eyes
Then maybe
Maybe, yeah maybe
One day
We'll meet again and you'll need me, you'll see me completely
Every little bit
Oh yeah maybe you'll love me, you'll love me then
I don't want to be tough
And I don't want to be proud
I don't need to be fixed and I certainly don't need to be found
I'm not lost
I need to be loved
I just need to be loved
I just want to be loved by you and I won't stop 'cause I believe
That maybe, yeah maybe
Maybe, yeah maybe
I should know better than to touch the fire twice
But I'm thinking maybe, yeah maybe you're mine
Maybe, love maybe
ouch.
that hurts.
Today I heard Meant to Live.
And I'm Yours.
And later on, on the way home from the mall, I turned around and saw THREE blue Honda Civics following behind Jonathan's car. THREE. How creepy is that.
I swear I'm not looking for signs.
They are just THERE.
EVERY where.
I want to be the one who helps mend it.
I want to be the girl who helps ease your pain
who helps calm your fears
i want to be her
